Great Ideas in the History of Hospital IT, Number 124: Energy Efficiency
Regular visitors to my blog with remember the debacle surrounding the customised screensaver my department were cajoled into writing to give everyone in my hospital guidance on hand hygiene. The fun doesn't stop there.
We have a person at the hospital who's responsibility it is to promote energy efficiency within the organisation, and spot where electricity is being wasted. I wasn't present for one of his recent decisions, but it must have gone something like this.
SCENE: A large but almost deserted office at lunchtime. There are a dozen or so computers around the room, and they are all switched on and displaying lurid screensavers. Enter ENERGY EFFICIENCY MAN, clutching a clipboard. He looks around the room and then goes over to MISS LONE WORKER.
ENERGY EFFICIENCY MAN: Is everyone at lunch?
MISS LONE WORKER: Yes, I'm working through my lunch hour. Can I help you?
EE MAN (PROUDLY): I'm Energy Efficiency Man! It's my job to promote energy efficiency within the hospital, and spot where electricity is being wasted. Whenever a light is left on in an empty room, I'll be there. Wherever a window is left open next to a fan heater, I'll be there. Whenever a member of staff has a question about energy efficiency... I'll be there!
MISS LW (EATING A SANDWICH): That's nice.
EE MAN: Tell me, citizen. Why are all of these computers showing pictures of germs and suchlike?
MISS LW: It's some kind of health promotion. About 3 minutes after everyone buggers off to lunch, the computers all start showing these posters about remembering to wash your hands. But no-one ever reads them because, well, they're at lunch.
EE MAN: So, all these machines sit here all lunchtime, not being used?
MISS LW: Yes.
SFX: A SMALL AND RATHER DIM ENERGY-EFFICIENT LIGHTBULB APPEARS OVER ENERGY EFFICIENCY MAN'S HEAD.
EE MAN: Energy Efficiency Man has an idea! Pass me that phone!
MISS LW HANDS EE MAN THE PHONE, AND HE PUNCHES IN SOME NUMBERS.
EE MAN (INTO PHONE): Hello, is that the Computer Department? It's Energy Efficiency Man here... Yes, really... No, they don't give me a special suit... Look, could I speak to someone who knows about screensavers and stuff?
EE MAN LOOKS UP AT MISS LW AND SILENTLY MOUTHS "THEY'RE GOING TO GET HIM". MISS LW IS MORE INTERESTED IN HER SANDWICH.
EE MAN (INTO PHONE): Hello? Yes. Energy Efficiency Man here. I have an idea. An amazing idea. An idea that could only be thought up by someone with a background in energy efficiency promotion such as myself. Be prepared to write this down, citizen... ready?
You know how all the computers in the hospital sit doing nothing during lunch-hours and just display a screen-saver about remembering to wash your hands?
Well... could you also make it say "don't forget to turn the lights out when you leave a room"?
We have a person at the hospital who's responsibility it is to promote energy efficiency within the organisation, and spot where electricity is being wasted. I wasn't present for one of his recent decisions, but it must have gone something like this.
SCENE: A large but almost deserted office at lunchtime. There are a dozen or so computers around the room, and they are all switched on and displaying lurid screensavers. Enter ENERGY EFFICIENCY MAN, clutching a clipboard. He looks around the room and then goes over to MISS LONE WORKER.
ENERGY EFFICIENCY MAN: Is everyone at lunch?
MISS LONE WORKER: Yes, I'm working through my lunch hour. Can I help you?
EE MAN (PROUDLY): I'm Energy Efficiency Man! It's my job to promote energy efficiency within the hospital, and spot where electricity is being wasted. Whenever a light is left on in an empty room, I'll be there. Wherever a window is left open next to a fan heater, I'll be there. Whenever a member of staff has a question about energy efficiency... I'll be there!
MISS LW (EATING A SANDWICH): That's nice.
EE MAN: Tell me, citizen. Why are all of these computers showing pictures of germs and suchlike?
MISS LW: It's some kind of health promotion. About 3 minutes after everyone buggers off to lunch, the computers all start showing these posters about remembering to wash your hands. But no-one ever reads them because, well, they're at lunch.
EE MAN: So, all these machines sit here all lunchtime, not being used?
MISS LW: Yes.
SFX: A SMALL AND RATHER DIM ENERGY-EFFICIENT LIGHTBULB APPEARS OVER ENERGY EFFICIENCY MAN'S HEAD.
EE MAN: Energy Efficiency Man has an idea! Pass me that phone!
MISS LW HANDS EE MAN THE PHONE, AND HE PUNCHES IN SOME NUMBERS.
EE MAN (INTO PHONE): Hello, is that the Computer Department? It's Energy Efficiency Man here... Yes, really... No, they don't give me a special suit... Look, could I speak to someone who knows about screensavers and stuff?
EE MAN LOOKS UP AT MISS LW AND SILENTLY MOUTHS "THEY'RE GOING TO GET HIM". MISS LW IS MORE INTERESTED IN HER SANDWICH.
EE MAN (INTO PHONE): Hello? Yes. Energy Efficiency Man here. I have an idea. An amazing idea. An idea that could only be thought up by someone with a background in energy efficiency promotion such as myself. Be prepared to write this down, citizen... ready?
You know how all the computers in the hospital sit doing nothing during lunch-hours and just display a screen-saver about remembering to wash your hands?
Well... could you also make it say "don't forget to turn the lights out when you leave a room"?
It was at the same time that H&S really started to bite, as Crown Immunity had been removed, and I do remember one H&S request that I had to comment on as it involved a bid for new lighting.
Hazard: Insufficient lighting in working area could lead to accidents.
Solution: Install new lighting system to eleviate problem
Location: Darkroom in the photographic section!!
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