That Tranny Budget Speech in Full
You might not realise this, but one of my duties as a member of the higher echelons of the Trannierati is to set the yearly budget for trannies in the UK. Everyone in the UK gets wall-to-wall media coverage of my budget speech, but for the benefit of my foreign readers, here's a transcript.
Mr Speaker, the last year has been a strong one for the Tranny Economy, with the first Sparkle doing much to strengthen the purple balloon and pin-badge industries. I stayed within my targets to keep breast inflation below the 38DD mark, and I kept within my "Golden Rule" that hem lengths should be at least 1 inch below the cut-off point for meat and two veg.
[cheers]
I am convinced that the height of heels is a cause for concern, and to that end in 2007 I will be introducing a stiletto tax. This will be 10 pence for the first three inches of heel, rising to 20 pence per inch above this limit. Heels of seven inches of more will be eligible for a "pratfall" tax of 50 pence per inch to cover the additional costs to the NHS resulting from heel-related injuries.
[boos]
I will continue to be vigilant to prevent the proliferation of trannies who post pictures online that look like Michael Elphick with tits... as I have said before, there will be no return to "Boon and bust".
[groans]
The tax on wine will rise by 4 pence a bottle, and on cigarettes by 9 pence a packet.
[solitary "FECK!"]
When it comes to the issue of trannie spending being siphoned off by unscrupulous tranny shops and mail-order firms, I will as always stick by my three watchwords: education, education and (...what's that word?... oh... can't read my own writing) education. All households in the UK with trannies under the age of 18 will be receiving in the next few days a leaflet entitled "Don't Go to Transformation, You Numpty".
This is a budget for pretty things. It is a budget that realises the importance of fluffiness. I commend this budget to the house.
Mr Speaker, the last year has been a strong one for the Tranny Economy, with the first Sparkle doing much to strengthen the purple balloon and pin-badge industries. I stayed within my targets to keep breast inflation below the 38DD mark, and I kept within my "Golden Rule" that hem lengths should be at least 1 inch below the cut-off point for meat and two veg.
[cheers]
I am convinced that the height of heels is a cause for concern, and to that end in 2007 I will be introducing a stiletto tax. This will be 10 pence for the first three inches of heel, rising to 20 pence per inch above this limit. Heels of seven inches of more will be eligible for a "pratfall" tax of 50 pence per inch to cover the additional costs to the NHS resulting from heel-related injuries.
[boos]
I will continue to be vigilant to prevent the proliferation of trannies who post pictures online that look like Michael Elphick with tits... as I have said before, there will be no return to "Boon and bust".
[groans]
The tax on wine will rise by 4 pence a bottle, and on cigarettes by 9 pence a packet.
[solitary "FECK!"]
When it comes to the issue of trannie spending being siphoned off by unscrupulous tranny shops and mail-order firms, I will as always stick by my three watchwords: education, education and (...what's that word?... oh... can't read my own writing) education. All households in the UK with trannies under the age of 18 will be receiving in the next few days a leaflet entitled "Don't Go to Transformation, You Numpty".
This is a budget for pretty things. It is a budget that realises the importance of fluffiness. I commend this budget to the house.
Labels: transvestism
I am surprised there are no Hamster Tax Credit mentions in there.
And don't forget that there will changes to the yearly tranny taxbased on emmission due to the rise of the "talking to much crap" tranny.
And when will the catalog of tranny classes coming out? I do so look forward to the course entitled "Crossing Legs and Closing Mouthes: The Classy Tranny".
I'd love to hear you reading it out loud, it needs your accent. :-)
Becky 4 Prime Minister.
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