Everybody's talking about those Kinky Boots

I might be setting myself up for disappointment here, but I'm starting to really look forward to seeing Kinky Boots, a comedy movie based on the real-life story of a failing Northampton shoe factory that changed it's fortunes by launching a range of fetish footwear for men.

There's a good interview with the film's star in today's Guardian, and some of the reviews I'm read have been quite positive. A slight worry is it's written by the same guy who wrote "Calendar Girls" and has been described as "heartwarming" in places, but hopefully it's not been too watered down to give it mass-market appeal.

We shall see.

Look, it's me!

My friend Summer sent me this, trés cool!

Web Curiosities

These are all things that have made me go "hmmm" recently but not quite warranted a full blog entry. Please allow them their brief moment in the limelight before they're forgotten forever.

• The spellchecker for blog posts on blogger.com doesn't recognise the words "blog", "blogging" or "blogger".
  
  
• The most popular tag word for the images on the trannyflickr photo pool is "me".
  
  
• There is no possible reason for the popularity of some of the sites in the Top 100 UK Tgirl Websites listing other than "people are idiots".
  
  
• On average, I get 3 hits a day to my site from people miss-typing theangels.co.uk as theangles.co.uk. I suppose technically I'm typosquatting.
  

The Greatest Tranny Anthems Never Written

No. 1: Don't Cha (for closet tranny fanciers)

Don't cha wish your girlfriend was fun like me?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hung like me?
Don't cha?
Don't cha?

;-)

Winter Vomiting seems to come earlier every year

Winter's just around the corner, and so the annual outbreak of Norovirus has taken hold at the hospital again. This cheeky little chappy is sometimes called SRSV (Small Round Structured Virus) or the rather less charming "Winter Vomiting virus".

It tends to spread in winter and it really does make you vomit, suddenly and without warning. Believe me. I'd always thought that projectile vomiting was something that only happened in the movies until I caught it a couple of years ago. One minute driving down the A10 (coming back en femme from a night out in Cambridge), the next minute pulled over in a layby, doing Linda Blair impressions over a hedge. Not nice. Especially for the man taking a pee behind the hedge^*.

So anyway, one of the problems with working in a hospital is that sick people tend to congregate here. And one of the inconsiderate swines has brought in Mr. Norovirus with him, who has set up shop in one of our wards.

The hospital's response? Send round this flyer to all staff:

If you have diarrhoea and/or vomit whilst at work you must do the following:

• Report your symptoms to the person in charge of the area where you were ill
  
  
• Inform your line manager
  
  
• Inform Occupational Health of your symptoms prior to going home

Ah NHS bureaucracy at it's best. If you start throwing up, tell three different people before you go home. Got it.

• Change out of your uniform and put in a plastic bag - wash at 60 degrees on its own

Er, I don't have a uniform. And won't washing a bag at 60 degrees melt it?

• Provide a stool specimen - a specimen pot can be collected from any ward or Occupational Health

Gotcha. Is this before or after I go home?

• Drink plenty of fluids

No problem. I'll stick to doubles all night.

• Wash your hands each time you have used the toilet

Damn, but that means I'll have to break my personal "only wash hands after every fourth trip to the loo" rule!

• Do not socialise at home or in public

Should I make a big sign on my door saying "UNCLEAN"?

• Do not return to work until 48 hours after your last symptom


• If you are the manager when someone reports to you they have been sick/diarrhoea - you must inform the Domestic Services Supervisor and close the area until it has been cleaned

I'll do that if someone says to me "I have been sick", but if someone says to me "I have been diarrhoea" I might just call the police.

It's going to be a long winter. :-/

-

^*That bit didn't really happen.

Transpocalype Now (well in two months, actually)

Ok, the teaser campaign is over...

...it's time.

So, who wants to come? :-)

Five random things from Wikipedia and how they relate to me

Here's an idea I just invented. Go to Wikipedia, click on the "Random Article" button, and write about how that thing relates to you, skipping stub articles and anything that doesn't resonate at all. Do this five times.

1. I've decided I'm not an Ascetic. I like pies too much.
   
2. I've never been to Iverville in Quebec. In fact I've never been anywhere in the Americas. I was planning to go to North America an Canada about 5 years ago, but the friend I was going to go with got made redundant the day before we booked the trip.
   
3. I've never used a total station, but I do know how to work a Theodolite and a level. In a previous life I used to work as a surveyor's assistant. Have you ever noticed the grave-like painted wooden crosses along the sides of roads that are being built? I used to make those, and I know how they work. It's all to do with ground levels. Oh yes.
   
4. I bought Semisonic's, "Feeling Strangely Fine", but I only really liked "Secret Smile" and "Closing Time".
   
5. Because I've never been to the US, I've not had the opportunity to sample the cuisine of California, except from it's exports. Big Mac anyone?
   

Jane

Jane came around at the weekend, which was nice. :-)

I've been avoiding blogging about Jane, because a) although I'm happy to write about most stuff in my blog, some things I'd like to keep private, at least until I understand them better; and b) I thought that if I made a Big Thing about dating a girl who had her own blog and who was already known to the tranny blogosphere, it would somehow make it seem like it was only being done for the novelty value, and lessen what it actually represents.

But the fact that we've deliberately not been talking about it has become the novelty, so it's time to get things out in the open.

So yes, Jane and I are "an item". It's great. :-)

Now I'm not going to blog a lot about it, not because there's nothing to say, but because there's too much to say, and I'm nowhere near getting my head around it all, just yet. I've started to unpack a box of thoughts and feelings that got put away when I split with my last proper girlfriend, over 2 years ago. I know that some of the things in there still have the potential to hurt me, and that's scary...

... but you're worth it Jane. :-) xxx

Monday morning answers type thing

The answers were:

1. The alphabet was all there, apart from K. So it's Miss K.

2. A Christmas hymn is a carol, and it was written as a cross, therefore Karol Cross.

Congratulations to "Ursa Minor" who got it right first, but wished to remain anonymous. Well done to everyone else who entered!

Sunday night puzzle type thing

Number one in a series of one (because I did these two and ran out of ideas).

Can you work out what the two things below represent?



I'll turn off comments on this one, if you can guess, email me. First person to get both right wins a mention and the kudos. :-)

I hate Hunstanton

Can we start some kind of blogger campaign to wipe Hunstanton off the face of the planet?

I've decided that it is the one place on the planet that is totally and irredeemably without merit. I spent only two hours there today and I was on the verge of topping myself. I found myself sitting in a god awful nautical-themed pub and vaguely wondering which of the sailor's knots on a diagram on the wall would be best used to make a noose.

Actually after two hours I wasn't just intent on topping myself. I was making plans to take a lot of the people in Hunstanton out with me. Those poor unfortunate proles for whom Hunstanton is a holiday destination! I realised that a lot of the people in the pub with me had chosen to be there, and that put me in a deep state of depression regarding the British public.

It's not because it's a brash fish-and-chips seaside town, other seaside towns are just the same, but they add a healthy dose of camp and kitch to the mix. Hunstanton somehow manages to be tacky, old fashioned and noisy without for a moment managing to be camp or kitch. I pride myself at being able to find a level where I can enjoy a situation. "Yes, this is naff... but it's enjoyably naff!" Hunstanton hasn't got a level. It's a bottomless pit of awfulness.

I realise this post is pretty pointless, you've likely never even heard of Hunstanton or you've heard about it and have no intention of visiting. But I needed to get that out of my system.

Come friendly bombs and rain on Hunstanton!

Big in Zagreb

Did you know that hr is the international country code for Croatia? I found out recently when I got five thousand visits from a site ending ".hr" and was trying to work out where it was based.

Apparently the Croatians love sudoku!

The reason why I tell you this stuff because I really want to boast to the programmers at work that I wrote a game that's a Slavic sensation, but I can't because they'll want to see it, and then they'll want to see what's on the rest of my site...

I was kind of pleased that I'd proudly put Hamster Sudoku on my Becky site. It felt good to say "I'm a tranny, this is a tranny site, but look I made this".

But conversely, to people I'm not "out" to, it means I have to avoid saying... "Look I made this! Oh yeah and it's on a tranny site... oh yeah and I'm a tranny."

Guess I can't have it both ways.

Mystery Mosaic

This took a lot more work that you might think! :-)

Women are from Venus...

... and men are from Venus too, so there!

Just been reading in The Guardian that the supposed psychological differences between men and women are, by and large, a myth.

So does this mean trannies can no longer claim they "think like a girl"? I hope so. Saying things like "my parking's terrible, I'm such a girl!" is basically reinforcing sexual stereotypes we should have abandoned years ago.

The report claims that in the only major differences between the two sexes are in motor skills and frequency of masturbation.

So I hope when I hear trannies claim feminine traits in the future it will be limited to claiming that they "throw like a girl" or, um... no the other alternative I something really don't want to hear!

Shooting for the Moon

Selina's been whining about the cost of America returning to the moon. In my opinion America has to go back to the moon. The Apollo missions were declared a success at the time, but it was conveniently forgotten that we'd completely failed to find or topple the Moon Government!

Now the moon's a breeding ground for space terrorists (probably), and it has a stranglehold over the largest cheese reserves in