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Wednesday, May 30, 2007

The Five Versions of Becky

Becky is, to a large extent, a digital entity. In reality at the moment I only answer to the name "Becky" about one night in a sixty, but virtual Becky exists all the time.

24/7 you can see her pictures, or browse her web site, or send her an email. This Becky (I'm tempted to call her something like CyberBecky to avoid confusion with the real flesh-and-blood Becky, but let's just make it clear that from now on when I'm talking about Becky I'm talking about the virtual version of me) is like my Electric Monk.

Douglas Adams invented the Monk in his book Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency as a labour-saving device for a technologically advanced society. In this society they had devices to do every tedious task, from VCRs to watch tedious television for them, to the Monk to believe in things for them. The Monk believed in things so people didn't have to. In the book he went wrong, and started to believe in all kinds of things. It's a great read, but I digress.

Virtual Becky cross-dresses so that I don't have to. I get some of the caché of being an active full-time transvestite without the tedious daily shaving, making up and dressing bit.

There have been several versions of Virtual Becky, as my transvestism has changed, and technology and my relationship to it has evolved.

Becky 0.1 Alpha

This was pre-release, and actually pre-internet. This early version of Becky was the subject of stories, basic tranny fantasies, written furtively on MacWrite and stored on a carefully hidden floppy disks.

You think that's weird? This first version of Virtual Becky was weird. Over time as Becky became more "real", Virtual Becky became less weird. But here, right back at the beginning, Becky was a very private, very odd, thing.

Actually, it was actually a bit weirder than that...

I found this little program that wrote random sentences, based on fairly complex grammatical rules. I re-wrote this program to make up random tranny fantasies with Becky as the subject. Because then it wasn't me making me dress up, it was the computer telling me to, do you see? Do you see? I'm not a transvestite... it's the computer making me do it!

Er... yeah... pretty weird, now I think about it.

Becky 0.5 Beta

Fast-forward quite a few years and I've discovered the Internet. At first I'm happy to treat it as a read-only medium, voraciously hunting down the tranny fiction that other people had posted. I remember looking at tranny sites a bit like this one and thinking it was all very interesting but it wasn't really for me. Because I wasn't like those transvestites who went out and did stuff, it all existed in my head and that's where I was happy to keep it.

I still had the creative urge to create "tranny interest" stuff, and I started to make "captioned images" with Photoshop. They followed quite a simple theme, a picture of a real girl with a caption that suggested she was actually a boy. Actually "caption" isn't really the right word, they were little stories. Some of them even had plots! ... Well maybe not plots as such, but definitely a form of narrative.

But yeah, still deeply weird.

The difference this time was I was sharing them with other people. I set up a little group on Lycos (remember when Lycos had groups?) to publish the captioned images to. It was quite a popular little group (by the standards of these things), and for the first time there were people who "knew" me as Becky, albeit only as an online persona.

Joanna knows me from back then. She's probably got a few captions of mine from back then that could really embarrass me if they ever saw the light of day... but we have enough dirt on each other to ensure mutual distruction!

After a while I started to get to know via chat some of the people who were reading my captions, and struck up online friendships.

One of the people I got chatting to was a guy called Jay, whose went by the femme name of Jade and the online name of Jaded. Jaded because he'd done the whole "out every night" tranny thing and got tired of the whole scene.

One day I really must write properly about Jay. He was instrumental in helping me find a proper place for Becky in my life, and I owe him a lot. Unfortunately he died suddenly of a heart attack a few years back, just as I was getting on to the tranny scene, and I never got to meet Jade en-femme.

Becky 0.9 (Release Candidate A)
Through the gentle encouragement of Jay, I was eventually persuaded to go on my first ever "proper" tranny shopping trip. Within a day I'd made my second trip to Transformation (the first was back in the Becky 0.1 days and involved a hideous velour maid's outfit) and bought a set of nasty silicon boobs and an M&S bra to keep them in.

Becky still wasn't out. But she was making tentative steps in that direction. I'd joined the Angels Yahoo group and had started talking properly about my transvestism. This was a major step. Up until now Becky had been just a fantasy, a mental construct who formed the subject of silly stories revolving around being made to dress up. For the first time I was admitting that I wanted to dress up, and that was a real watershed.

Becky 1.0
Within months I'd made my first outing, and within days of that outing I'd bought the beckysweb domain and set up this site. It was basically just a place to show off my coveted first makeover pictures, but I put a little thought into the design (I went for the "deliberately crap" look... it's served me well ever since) and I was quite happy with the result.

Thanks to the Internet Archive Wayback Machine, you can get an idea of what my site used to look like all those years ago. Some of the pictures are broken, but it still kinda works.

Version 1 of Virtual Becky lasted quite a while, with just minor increment upgrades. I kept going out, and I kept posting pictures. Each new set of pictures had a bit of a background story to accompany them, but I didn't really say much about me, I wasn't happy revealing too much about Simon, or what I really thought about stuff.

I also started sticking other stuff on the site, the tranny licence dates from about Becky 1.2.

Becky 2.0


The latest, and current, version of Becky was brought about by sticking a blog onto the site, and then realising I actually had to write stuff to fill it. Suddenly I realised that to have a blog that was anything more than "what club Becky went to this week" I'd need to write about me, and that meant writing about Simon as well as Becky, and re-incorporating Simon and Becky into one entity.

Thus Virtual Becky completed a arc, starting as a very private thing in my head, moving out onto the web, then further out into the real world and finally home again. Now she's in my head and "out there".

It seems to be working like this.

But I feel vague twinges, like things are going to change. I wonder what Becky 3.0 will be like.

...

I kinda wrote this in the hope that other people might be able to relate... maybe not to the weirder bits, but in general. Have you gone through your own "ages" online?

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Emma G  I thought this was a beautiful, touching and personal post and it called up lots of memories of "ages" I went through. Some of the ones you labeled "weird" lasted many years for me. I bought a cheap poloraid camera just so I could have a document or two of Emma (whose name was first Victoria). And I kept them ( a total od five) stashed inside a box in the basement. I did pretty much the same route as you on line, being just and observer for a long time, then joining in by writing stories or actually talking in chat groups. There was a Canadian site then, "The Wildside" I think it was called where I started figuring out who Emma was and was not. I found other chats and forums, and eventually I met my partber on one of them. I made friends that I traded phone numbers with and had long conversations with. I actually had my first "girlfriend" (as in two girls being best friends) connection with one of them We spent some nights talking for hours, crying, sharing secrets. When I finally got to Australlia to meet my partner "in real", we had already being talking on line and by phone for 18 months.(and literally $1000s of dollars)
Like lots of relationships , we withindrew to build a life between us and I went back to being an observer seeking answers to specific questions on line again. I guess I also got Emma out into the real world more. It was easier being in a country where I had no history.
Now I'm somewhere between your 1.0 and 2.0 versions. And I understand what you mean about the virtual/real personas and how they start to merge, but stay separate too. And it seems to be working well that way for me also.

Thanks for a terrific post, Becky


Hugs 
steph_angel  I've gone through exactly those stages over the years, apart from the hideous velour maid's outfit perhaps ;-)

Sometimes it takes time to realise that your life has moved into a new version and it takes time to grasp exactly what form this new version has taken (oh it's a bit like the regenerating Dr. Who!!!)... Steph quietly morphed into version 3.0 a little while ago (marriage & a baby perhaps had a hand in this???) and I'm still trying to get to know all of the quirks of this new version...

And as usual I write more on other people's blogs than I do on my own!!! 
Joanna  Nice post.

If it makes you feel safer I only have three of your v0.5 images, and they are the more (deliberately) comical ones you did ;)

We've all gone through many stages, and like many things it's something I should document myself sometime. I think it's also down to how the nature of the Internet has changed over the years as it has become much easier to stop just reading and start creating/sharing bits of ourself.

Kinda worried what Becky Vista or the equivalent will look like. 
Miss K  I appear to have got stuck as the weird version. Like if Colin Baker never. regenerated. shudder.

Great writing Bex 
Alli' Cat'  Nothing to contribute to the 'stages' theme I'm afraid; but I just wanted to say, "what a great post". Thanks for the link to Becky 1.0's site - very interesting (I guess I must have started with Becky 2.0). One thing seems to have remained constant: your irreverent and self-deprecating sense of humour - one of the things that makes me keep coming back. Keep up the good work!

@Joanna: "Becky Vista" [shudder!] 
Laura Lenley  Becky, the stages of our individual TG-ness are reflected in your own story.

And while we identify with the progression, I'm still comforted by the by-product of your blog. That is, just by hearing your story, and reading replies from others, I'm once again reminded that I'm not alone in this gig.

Thanks for that. 
NH  For me, "Logo needs work" is still the best Becky Sweb strapline. 
Lynn Jones  While there's a fair amount of similarity in tranny lifepaths, it's the little bits that make it different for each of us - and therein lies the hook that makes each story unique.

I think the Becky 2.0 part speaks volumes (at least to me). It's the jump when there is no longer a split in behaviour - a move to just one personality if you will. Two names yes, but someone who's whole - no more denial and segregation.

Becky 3.0... Peace?

> through your own "ages" online?

I guess so. I did the fiction thing (just the one story), missed on images and bypassed the Geocities pages for a blog instead. It's all there in glorious blogtastic backstory. Reading back through some of the posts, it's weird looking back to see where you've come from. 
Jayne  Funny, when I first checked in all of those years ago, I was a very unhappy lost soul. I loved your early jokes about improving the site and just enjoying what you were in Kings Lynn, the tranny capital...

I changed and I had a lot of help to do so, not just from the NHS, but from the people who touched my soul. I religiously carried my Tranny License right up until I stopped feeling like a tranny. Is this selling out or going the whole hog?

I don't know what version I am now, but it probably involves some form of Penguins (I am now investigating Linux)

I remember writing to Becky about three years ago saying that she was inspirational. I still believe that, but she inspires me in a different way today.

So Becky next version? How about hitting those Benjamin Standards and coming the whole way? You pass easier than some of the poor souls I met on my journey.

Thanks for making being TG fun, the NHS make it far too serious...
Loves Ya
XXX 
Mariana  You're such an adorable person, Becky! I'm glad I found you on the internet. If you're this mature and interesting now I really look forward to what the future will bring. 
Lara Tyg  Well as long as your using the computer o/s analogy, I think I'm still stuck in basic.

10 for x = 1 to 1000,000
20 if x < 1000,000 then gosub 70
30 if x > 1000,000 then goto 50
40 next x
50 print "Move on to next level !"
60 goto 10
70 print "dress"
80 return

Yes I remember the old site, & remember feeling a little warmer that there was another so close to home going through the same. Although Iv'e tried to hold back keep things in check for so many years I guess every TV can recognise the different periods they go through & clearly remember their mindset at the time.
Glad you brought this up & hope the married version Becky is a happy one. 
Joggerblogger  Great post :-)

I've known Becky version 1 and 2 and love ya x 

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Monday, May 28, 2007

Bring back nostalgia

A thought... now that Neighbours has been bought by Channel 5, what will replace it in the coveted BBC1 teatime-just-before-the-news slot?

I'm hoping they take the opportunity to bring back a classic... Willow the Wisp! Paddington! Ivor the Engine! The Clangers!

BBC4's current season on the history of children's television is pure unadulterated nostalgia. There was a fascinating programme on Peter Firmin tonight, which reminded me of his excellent autobiography Seeing Things, which I read a few years ago. Peter is one of my heroes, a true genius of television (and I'm not just limiting that to "children's television"). There's something about his whimsical imagination and endless invention coupled with a peculiarly British make-do-and-mend creative method. Even now when I hear his gentle voice I'm transported back to my childhood, prostrate on the rug in front of the goggle box.

I wonder if I did actually grow up in a golden age of British kids TV, or whether every generation thinks they do?

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Tiffy  I don't believe it! I stick something on my Blog about the super Firmin/Postgate thing on BBC4, then go and have a look at Becky's...

Well, it was good, wasn't it?

xx 
Becky  It was brill Tiffy, and spooky that you'd blogged about it too. :-) 
Lynn Jones  It's an interesting question. There was only 3 channels back then (eee, but we were proud!) so maybe we ended up watching a lot of the same stuff.

There seems to be a lot more innocence to the earlier kids programmes (Ivor the Engine, Blue Peter, etc) whereas now things seem to be more combat orientated (any action figure cartoon). Maybe I'm looking at the content from an adult point of view.

Nowadays with the sheer proliferation of choice (translation: there's f*** all worth watching) decent kids TV is spread so thinly there's less chance of you watching the same stuff as your mate.

Although, if my nephew is your average kid, they seem to be far more interested in texting, using MSN and YouTube. :) 
Freiya  i think there is an element of rose tintedness, but saying that i do think stuff was more inventive back then. I feel that the series creators maybe where given more freedom to do what they wanted and so we got stuff like The Clangers, or Jackanory.
I'm not sure if something like Jackanory, or Tony Hart's various programmes, would survive now, it would have to be all wizz, bang and flash with a touch of irony/innuendo thrown in for the adults...bah! 
NH  Back in the 60s and 70s, children's television was created by people who had an idea and were allowed to run with it. Now, with the "Teletubbies" and "Balamory", these shows are created by "child behaviour specialists" and committees and are designed to appeal to a model of childhood worked out in a meeting room.

...and all the imported stuff is worked out by marketing executives. 
Steg  Couldn't agree more with what nh said. Kids TV seemed to be driven by ideas way back when, rather than now when the primary consideration seems to be kow-towing to the current perception of "politically correct" and ensure that no minority could possibly take offence.
Bring back "Noggin the Nog", that's what I say! 
Alli' Cat'  Noggin the Nog - cool (I was keeping quiet as I thought I may be the only one who remembers).
What about "The Magic Roundabout"? I seem to recall questions being asked in parliament when the BBC announced they were considering moving it to an earlier time-slot! 
Mariana  My 70s memories of children's tv isn't too great: it was mostly Japanese and crummy Hanna-Barbera type of cartoons, that weren't even bad enough to reach the "so bad it's good" status. The one that got away with that prize was a Hulk animation that was basically just the panels of the comic strips and only the jaws of the characters would move, like creepy ventriloquist dummies!

My favorite cartoons were Warner Bros, like Bugs Bunny and such, but they were hardly ever on... *sniff!* A deprived childhood indeed. 
Penny M  Pogle's Wood anyone? 
Kat  Best pished conversation of the last few months was where a friend couldn't remember Bod's name and went through every variation imaginable until we pointed out his mishap.

Pob? Pod? Bop? 
Pandora Caitiff  Most of my friends remember Bod (Pob was a very different children's show!), but very few can remember that Bod shared a programme with: Alberto the Frog and His Amazing Animal Band.

Alberto was the only cartoon (or real) frog I know addicted to milkshakes.

"I think its going to be... chocolate!" 
Joanna  I think its going to be... chocolate!

no, it was strawberry... :)

I think what was so apparent from the show was how many of our Kids TV shows from the 70's were real labours of love by a small group of people (often just one or two) who produced this stuff in small runs like a cottage industry, often in their back room or garage.

The more 'worthy' modern stuff all seems to have been written by committee, with an educational psychologist on the team alongside an equal opportunities rep.

Stuff like the Clangers, Ivor the Engine and Bagpuss had a great sense of wonder about them and they entertained and opened the imagination without being explicitly *Educational*.

I haven't watched the 80's one yet, so I am looking forward to wallowing in some Cosgrove Hall nostalgia - hopfully some Jamie and the Magic Torch, Chorlton and the Wheelies and Dangermouse.

And no, they don't make em like that anymore, which is a shame. 

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This morning I are mainly knackered

Blergh... it might not look it on the map, but Britain is big. Traveling any distance across it is a tiring process.

The main purpose of the trip was a party at Jessica's to celebrate her quarter-century, which was great fun. Look, I dressed!

Bad bunch, best of

Yeah, I know it's not that good a picture, but it was the best of a bad bunch and, as Siobhan points out, I'm bound by The Law. If we don't post pictorial proof that we've dressed in public within 48 hours, according to Transvestite Law it never actually happened, and these big black flying monsters turn up to erase the event from history. True! My hands are tied.

Oh, and guess who we went to see on Sunday! Only one of the icons of the UK tranniesphere, that's who! She might seem to disappear occasionally, and she's getting a little long in the tooth, but she's still one of Lancaster's finest. I'm talking of course about, Erin. Well, we were kind of in the neighbourhood, seemed rude not to. She's looking well. Oh, and Siobhan was there too. Which was nice. :-)

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Penny M  What do you mean, its a lovely picture! 
Jessica Hart  Yes, it is a lovely picture - wish I could get away with a skirt that length (well, get away with it and not look like mutton dressed up as lamb) 

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Friday, May 25, 2007

"Just one more thing"...

... as well as being the inevitable title of Peter Falk's autobiography, tends to be my attitude when I get the blog-template-fiddling bug.

You can now subscribe by email to this blog, by putting your email addy in the little box in the right column and hitting "go". So now Becky's T-Blog will get to you (in some form) even if you're stuck behind a po-faced work firewall! :-)

I promise to stop fiddling now.

Yeah, right... as if... I'll keep fiddling like Columbo keeps badgering amoral English (the evilest ones are always English) wine connoisseurs until they finally snap and admit they bludgeoned their missus to death with an ice sculpture.
Joggerblogger  You know that you will not stop fiddling ;-) EVER. 
Siobhan Curran  > Columbo keeps badgering amoral Irish (the evilest ones are always Irish) wine connoisseurs until they finally snap and admit they bludgeoned their missus to death with an ice sculpture.

Damm. Rumbled 
Pandora Caitiff  Had to share this:

Peter Falk, who played Columbo, has a glass right eye and it remained a mystery whether this glass eye "played the part of a real eye" for 25 years until 1997's Columbo: A Trace of Murder.

(From Wikipedia naturally) 
Emma G  Don't know if he included it in his autobiography, but Peter Falk gave an interview where he mentioned teaching to fill in for sporadic acting roles before Columbo. He said he used to take the glass eye out and leave it on the desk if he left the class room telling the students "I can still keep my eye on you" 
Anonymous  Hi,does anyone know where in London Peter Falk is signing copies of his autobiography today? i heard it was around oxford street somewhere :-s 

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Thursday, May 24, 2007

The Great Leap Forward

Well, not quite. I've just finished giving the blog a bit of a minor revamp. Thanks to a handy hint from Jessica the new feed is now in place quicker than I thought, and with one or two new nifty features added.

I've also made some little changes here and there to the actual blog pages, hope you like them!

Labels:

Natalie  That's just a super gold power level you've got there Bex!

It's even cheap! 
Becky  Top tip: never comment on spam on my blog... the spam will get deleted and you'll look foolish. ;-) 
Natalie  Sorry. I look silly. There are worse things to be. I'll know in the future. 
Becky  Sorry Nat, I delete spam on principle, but I'm not happy to delete comments from real people, even if it is just replying to the spam. :-) 

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I'm moving, make sure you don't lose touch

Moving house is said to be among the most stressful things that you can do. Based on recent research, I think the nearest equivalent in blogging is probably moving XML feeds.

To cut a long story short I want to move all my blog subscribers on various feeds to single Feedburner feed. There are things I will do in the background that might make this painless and transparent to you, but to be absolutely sure you're subscribed to the definitive never-to-be-deleted feed of Becky's T-Blog, make sure you're using the link below:


And to make it even easier, here are some buttons to help you subscribe via some of the popular readers:

Add to Google Reader or Homepage Subscribe in NewsGator Online Subscribe in Bloglines

Please make the switch, I'm paranoid about losing you! :-/

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Lauren Teo  Darn, I hate feedburner because it means I don't get the correct favicon next to any feeds from it. 
Becky  Hmm, thanks for that Lauren. I did a bit of research and it seems that it's an issue with feed readers rather than feedburner itself, see here.

It says on that page:many, but not all, feed readers and web-based aggregators look to the feed’s original host site, not feedburner.com, for the favicon to display. If you see FeedBurner’s own favicon displaying when your site’s feed appears in a news reader, please let us know about that news reader.

So it might be worth dropping them a line about your feed reader. 
Jessica Shannon  easiest way to redirect "http://www.beckysweb.co.uk/beckysblog/atom.xml" to feedburner on your webspace is create a folder called atom.xml and put a default.asp in it with a response.redirect. Also you should use "response.status = 301" 
Jessica Shannon  ps. you'll want to change the location blogger publishs too and update feedburner first :) 
Becky  Thanks Jess, ingenious!

That worked a treat. :-) 

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Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Blogroll 3.0

I've been exercising my more-or-less atrophied web programming muscles. Take a gander at the new-look blogroll running down the left side of the main blog page.

Not only do the most-recently-active bloggers appear first in the list, you can now see what they've blogged about too.

What's more, you can even subscribe to a feed of my blogroll, should you so desire. Actually, if you've not toyed with feed readers, this feed might be a good one to get you going. It's like a sumptuous taster menu of blogging, all in one place.

Whatevah, I'm pretty chuffed with it. :-)

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Joggerblogger  very cool :-) 
Zaida Angel  The most obvious effect from that thingie, is the nearly instant decrement of the productivity of thousands of readers of your blog.

Like me D: 
Lynn Jones  Impressive. Most impressive. :) 
Chrissy J.  Remarkably clever, I must say. :D

How long before the computer reads said blogs for you, so cutting out the middle person altogether? 
Mariana  Thanks for the linkage, Becky! I've linked you back as well. And I love the Tranny and TV comic, it's brilliant. 
steph_angel  Very posh indeed... I'll now have to think extra hard about my blog post titles ;-) 
Freiya  okay, that is cool, i'm going to have to be extra creative with post titles now...... 
Freiya  ....which is what steph just said !, i am also going to have to be extra creative about my comment posting now ( and maybe read other ones properly ) :) 
Becky  LOL. Well actually Steph just said she was going to think extra hard, not be extra creative. For all I know she might be thinking hard about titles that will break my blog template. :-) 
Tess  Oooooo, very nifty. Nice. 
Becky  Gah, trust Isobel to break it! :-)

She's one of these people who seems somehow to put their entire blog entry in the title area... fixed now to take that into account! :-) 
Tiffany  I feel SO 2005. I actually GO to the blogs I read to catch up on them...with the exception of Livejournal, since that so conveniently puts my friends on one page in chronological order of posting and has been doing so since 2002. ;P I bet ya five bucks no one subscribes to my RSS. D: 
Jane  @ Tiffy - I do! I believe you owe me some money :) 
Tiffany  Whaaaa? Is it the right one?
(Atom)
(RSS)

Because if so, I'm sufficiently wowed. :D 
Jane  Atom 
Tiffany  Okay, you get my Livejournal feed. Since my Blogger is essentially nonexistent.

But I kind of don't have $5. :( I sorry. 

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Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Look 4 Maddie ¡Please!


I saw this during my walk home yesterday, scrawled on a bus stop. It made me realise just how pervasive this story has become in the UK. It also struck me as interesting that they used the Spanish-style inverted exclamation mark to emphasize the "please!". It made me wonder who the writer was, who they expected to read it, and what they'd hoped to achieve. Maybe this made them feel like they were doing something to help a situation entirely out of their hands.

It also makes me wonder how much longer the story of this little blonde girl can stay in the news. Every day seems to bring a new lead, often barely newsworthy but hungrily seized apon by the British media. Today it was reported that the Portuguese police are going to start using face recognition technology to scan holiday snaps taken at the resort at the time around the kidnapping. Worthwhile, possibly, but it's starting to sound increasingly like they're clutching at straws.

On a lighter note, did anyone else see Paul Merton in China last night? It featured the ingenious Mr Wu, a Chinese farmer who makes robots out of rubbish. Each one named after their creator, and each one wonderfully idiosyncratic. The moment where the giant silver robot appeared - solemnly pulling a rickshaw past the window of the room where Paul was chatting to Mr Wu's long-suffering wife - was the most magical thing I've seen on television in ages.

I found a video of the robot on Youtube last night, which doesn't quite give you the full experience, but will give you an idea...

NH  I've heard of one Mr. Wu who takes rubbish and recycles them into food for his chain of all you can eat Chinese restaurants. 
Joanna  I caught the second half of the Paul Merton thing, and saw the Mr Wu bit, the Robot Rickshaw was amazing! 
Freiya  i was looking forward to seeing this but of course i missed it, hopefully they'll repeat it sometime soon as the robots look quite insane.... 

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Monday, May 21, 2007

A regime of clinically-controlled shrubs

Tranny and TV cartoon

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Carolyn Ann  :-)

Love it!

Do you get any of part of the profits? :-)

Carolyn Ann 
Alli' Cat'  Where do I sign up?
:-D 
Tess  So all these bruises and broken bones and detatched retinas from jumping out trees has been for nothing! The salesman lied to me. 
Alli' Cat'  Coming soon - to a branch of Transformation near you! 
NH  As Mr. Burns said in "The Simpsons" after his body was crushed.

"Every bone broken...crushed intestines...slight nausea...loss of appetite..." 
Freiya  fab! 'a regime of clinically controlled shrubs' :) 
Emma G  This is the first of these I'd seen Becky. I thought it was wonderful. Then I spent a really pleasant afternoon reading through the rest and was amazed at how very insightful they ALL are. A fine body of work.

But I'm going to blame you for the deadline I've missed. :-) 
Chrissy J.  ... But I'm going to blame you for the deadline I've missed. :-)

And why not, Emma? Becky (and T&T) get blamed for almost everything else... 

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Sunday, May 20, 2007

Crazed plea

Why, for the love of God, why, is it the case that if you type "Plastic Canvas Eeore" into Google Image Search, do you get so many pictures of me?

What does it mean? Wibble.
Jane  Not just you - it's me and chocolate daleks!

mmmmm daleks!

I hasten to add their are no photos of me with a chocolate dalek.

Yet....

Hey Becky I've just had an idea for our wedding cake. 
Becky  Yep, that is a fantastic Chocolate Dalek, I'm proud to share a set of search results with it. :-) 
Jane  Or you can see it here, in context, chocolate dalek :D 
Michelle Faith  never a dull moment 
Alli' Cat'  I don't know what's weirder: That search bringing back so many references to you, or you entering that search in the first place!! 8-S 
Zaida Angel  You know what'd be cool ?
A Plastic canvas eeore wedding cake.

Google that and press F5 for free coins. 
Emma G  The Plastic Canvas reference "might" be interpreted as a "compliment". Plastic as being malleable, changeable, and canvas as being a space to create on. In other words "A work of Art". Eeore is a bit harder though since it appears to be a typo. Did you mean Eeyore? That's easy too...a much beloved character! 
Emma G  Feel Better now 
Steg  It only works with Google's safesearch filtering turned off, so even more worryingly they obviously consider your pictures "explicit"! 
Pandora Caitiff  Pedantic answer: Eeore (sic) was/is a very regular commenter, and plastic and canvas have been mentioned quite often in relation to shoes/clothes.

*slaps self* 
Becky  Yes, that is the pendantic answer, Pandora. :-P Also, the misspelling of Eeore helped.

Doesn't quite explain why Google Images is so shit at spotting that the pictures are completely irrelevant! :-) 
Jessica Hart  It only works if you turn safe search off - doens't that say something significnat :) 

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Saturday, May 19, 2007

Uncharacteristically organised

When, earlier in the week, I finally decided I was going to try to get to this year's Sparkle, I was pretty sure I'd left it too late to get a decent (and more importantly cheap) hotel room.

But in a real stroke of luck, a chance encounter with a dodgy geezer (I think he might have been an admirer - he had a really made-up sounding name) in the Angels chatroom has landed me with a reservation for one of the hotels on the doorstep of Canal Street.

Result! Thanks a million dodgy geezer! (Okay, maybe you're not too dodgy) ;-).

So yes, I'll be at Sparkle. And, in a break with tradition dating back to the pre-Sparkle Transmission Birthday Party days, I'll be arriving on the Friday!

To celebrate, lets all sing the Cat Macros song! :-)

By the way, Isobel's bravely agreed to ride shotgun with me and Jane. So that's one definite... who else is going?
Stephanie Delacey  I'd love to go, just for one night at least, but I can't afford it and stupidly I've been avoiding dodgy geezers in chatrooms lately. Still, that's my strategy for next year sorted... 
Sera  I'm so jealous! I'd love to be able to get there, but unfortunately it won't be this year. Between work and everything there just never seems to be any time for travel.

I hope you have a blast!

Hugs
Sera 
Lynn Jones  > ride shotgun

Surely Sparkles not that rough? :)

Have fun and enjoy your cheap room. I'll have to read the expolits on other people's blogs. 
Connie Cox  dodgy?
Have a fab time! 
Penny M  I'll be there. My first Sparkle :-) 
Jessica Hart  Yep, I'll be there. Hotel booked, flight booked, just need to sort out Pickfords for the wardrobe & makeup!

I see New Labour are having a coronation bash for Gordan B on the Sunday in Manchester - whose up for gatecrashing... 
Valerie S  So you're not staying at The Place this time?

Moim Milla & Milla are coming, dressed in full Lordi costumes. 
Chrissy J.  Beth and I are going, but I'm sans motorbike, so no wheelies up Canal Street :O ...
Sparkle isn't rough unless you're within about, ooh, twenty feet of me, then you start to wish you'd brought a Taser... The target is optional, last year one guy used it on himself to prevent me outdrinking him, Southern lightweight he was... 

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Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Please insert disk 2 of 14

TROUSERFALL
EnVerite interactive transgendered fiction
Copyright (C) 2007 by Becky Enverite. All rights reserved.
Release 1 / Serial Number 0001

CHAPTER TWO

Bar
You are in the bar area of the tranny club. The bar is to the north, behind which is a barman serving drinks. There is a seating area to the west, and a dance floor to the east. The exit is to the south.

The Goth Tranny says "I've just seen a friend. Have a nice night!"

The Goth Tranny heads eastward and disappears into the crowd.

>BUY DRINK
The Barman starts to pour you a glass of wine and says "that will be £3 please love".

>GIVE MONEY TO BARMAN
You don't have that.

>INVENTORY
You have:
 no wine
 an unsuitable top (worn)
 an unsuitable skirt (worn)
 unsuitable shoes (worn)
 an infeasible amount of make-up (worn)
 a wig (worn)
 an unfamiliar and strangely bumpy black handbag

>EXAMINE HANDBAG
A cursory examination of the handbag reveals it's certainly not yours, you probably accidently picked up the Goth Tranny's handbag.

>OPEN HANDBAG
Opening the goth handbag reveals a hairbrush, an eyeliner, a dark lipstick, goth handbag fluff, and some money.

>GIVE MONEY TO BARMAN
What the hell, you can always pay her back later. You give £3 of the Goth Tranny's money to the barman and he hands you a glass of wine.

>DRINK WINE
You drink the glass of wine. It's almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.
A Trollish Tranny enters from the south. She immediately spots you and comes over.
"Hello! I thought you said you'd moved to an oil rig!"

>GO WEST
Seating Area
This is a large seating area containing several tables. Large crowds of trannies and other types are here. There is a door to the north. There is a bar area to the east.
The sole piece of decoration is a balloon, tied to a weight on one of the tables.
Sitting at one of the tables is a Dwarfish Tranny.
Standing chatting to a group of friends is what appears to be either a Very Pretty Tranny or a Very Pretty Real Girl.

>EXAMINE VERY PRETTY TRANNY
I'm not sure if it IS a tranny!

>EXAMINE VERY PRETTY REAL GRIL
I'm not sure if it IS a Real Girl! All I know is, it's a person!

>EXAMINE VERY PRETTY PERSON
She is beautiful. Just from looks you can't work out for certain if she's really a boy or not. You get the sudden urge to go over and chat to her.

The Trollish Tranny enters from the east.
"Oh this is where you went! This bar furniture kind of reminds me of the passenger lounge at Stevenage station. Before the 1997 refurbishment, of course."

The Very Pretty Person seems to shudder at the sound of the Trollish Tranny's voice and immediately heads east.

>GO EAST
The Trollish Tranny follows you.

Bar Area
The Very Pretty Person is here.
The Very Pretty Person sees the Trollish Tranny and heads east.

The Trollish Tranny says "Seems quiet tonight. I wonder if everyone's been held up by the roadworks on the A1492. It's only blocked northbound, but of course that has a knock-effect on the A1495, and then... heheh... it's basically every man for himself all the way down to the B14821!"

>SAY "GOODBYE" TO THE TROLLISH TRANNY
The Trollish Tranny doesn't seem to understand that.

The Dwarfish Tranny enters from the West.

>SAY "GO AWAY" TO THE TROLLISH TRANNY
The Trollish Tranny doesn't seem to understand that.

The Dwarfish Tranny sits down and sings about gold.

>GO EAST
The Trollish Tranny follows you.

Dance Floor
Disco lights play off shadowy bodies. Everyone is dancing. There is a bar to the west.

The Very Pretty Person skirts past you and your friend and heads west.

There is a DJ here, playing a song by the Pet Shop Boys.

>GO WEST
No, actually I think it's "Suburbia".

>GO WEST
Oh I see what you mean, sorry. You go west. The Trollish Tranny follows you.

Bar Area
The Very Pretty Person is here.
The Very Pretty Person sees the Trollish Tranny and heads east.

The Trollish Tranny says "Did I ever tell you about my model aeroplane collection?"

>GO WEST
The Trollish Tranny follows you.

Seating Area
The Dwarfish Tranny is here.
The Trollish Tranny says "What's your favourite type of traction engine?"

>LOOK
Seating Area
This is a large seating area containing several tables. Large crowds of trannies and other types are here. There is a door to the north. There is a bar area to the east.
The sole piece of decoration is a balloon, tied to a weight on one of the tables.
Sitting at one of the tables is a Dwarfish Tranny.

>TAKE BALLOON
You untie the balloon from it's weight and take it.

>EXAMINE BALLOON
It's just a balloon. It's kinda pink.

>GO NORTH
The Trollish Tranny follows you.

Corridor
This area seems to have been used by some trannies to get changed. Discarded items of male clothing are piled along the walls. There is a door to the north marked "Gents". There is a door to the east marked "Ladies". There is a door to the west marked "Other".
There is a discarded wig here.
There is a pair of glasses here.
There is a ring here.
There is a Giant Tranny here, standing by the door to the west.

>TAKE ALL
You take the wig. It's a strawberry blonde one, completely unlike the deep copper one you're wearing.

You take the pair of glasses. They're Dame Edna style. The T